paradise

Conspiratorial Pissings, Lyricless Kerfuffle

Thu, 07 May 2020 08:56:08 +0000

Conspiratorial Pissings, Lyricless Kerfuffle

Whoooa, just realised both my last posts didn't take.

Write.as has a thing against me.

Do ya, guys?

—

Taking a short little “coffee” (matcha and writeas) break from my totally kick ass worknight. Thought I'd drop in and be up a hello.

Speaking of being up a hello

SQUAREPUSHER – BE UP A HELLO !!!

Fucking love that album. Great work music. For me, anywayzle.

Tonight's playlist:

Hours and hours of lyricless electro background noise arranged in musical pentameter

Also layered in the kerfuffle is a 13.8 Hz binaural tone.

And a smattering of vitamins. B complex, magnesium taurate, oestrogen blockers, lithium orotate, butterbur extract, 350 mg centrophenoxine, and 200 mg lamictal. All in all that's a real fine alchemie swirling for me there, and I super recommend it!

Tell me what YOU are listening to?

Another day in, Paradise

— .:~:..:~:..:~:..:~:..:~:..:~:..:~:..:~:..:~:..:~:. published not proofread. #NeverLookBackspace! Words, Ideas, Magic copyrighted by Zem in Paradise. this is confidential communication. Protected by US and International law.

How Girls Talk, S2 Ep 109: Telepathic Singularity, Octopuses, spookily similar handwriting and Friends who are ghosts

Tue, 18 Jun 2019 06:53:50 +0000

Mind dump

Mon, 10 Jun 2019 15:19:13 +0000

Oookay, buckling up, it's THAT day where I close all my browser tabs because insanity cuppeth runneth over.

In any which way, I'm going to drop my threads here to gather later, when I have more time to air out my brain.

So one of my hobbies about 3 weeks ago was programming my portable EEG.

So I could play video games with it.

Naturally.

Play any VR game with Brain Control: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_yG75R7id6s

An Analysis of Game Related Emotions Using EMOTIV EPOC: https://www.researchgate.net/publication/327893366_An_Analysis_of_Game-Related_Emotions_Using_EMOTIV_EPOC

Rowan's Primer of EEG E-book: https://www.amazon.com/Rowans-Primer-EEG-Lara-Marcuse-ebook/dp/B015QZXVRW/ref=sr_1_3?keywords=eeg+textbook&qid=1558754371&s=books&sr=1-3

Electroencephalography Pocket Guide: https://imotions.com/blog/eeg/

I just couldn't find the spare hours to dedicate to teaching myself, argh!

Read Richard Morgan's (of Netflix' Altered Carbon fame) Th1rte3n. Fuck yes to noir scipunk action heroes and sexy Turkish NYPD badass femme fatales. Quick read.

Also re-read Suskind's Perfume.

All while I wasn't hanging out with you lot.

Speaking of scented air

Been lately developing some sublime fragrances in me ole' organ. Perfumes take years to create. For mortals. The less I eat the more immortal I am. Therefore, less years to create perfumes.

Its the greatest nonverbal form of abstract communication that everyone “gets”.

Go ⌘→ THAT WAY, Wookie men on ice skates, and suburb technopunk.

Tue, 04 Jun 2019 15:24:11 +0000

Good morning, Write.as!

Haven't talked to you in about a week. Been busy in my paradisiacal neck of the neon.

CJ's LFL mention reminds me of all the LFLs I've been the FIRST TO REVIEW ON my shared account on YELP (I write about the cool hidden stuff, my SO writes about the mundane). A badge of honor I cherish, because bringing more people to a little free library means more books for me to steal, annotate, and gingerly return.

It reminds me of a project I was doing for a dying friend, who's y2k blogs that have since gone offline really could have benefitted from an old school longform zine publication. A project I am still dedicated to doing (someday). Crazy wacky Neo Zen Buddhism, proto Tony Robbins (without the abusive screaming and philandering). Yup, its a whole roundup of text that, when implanted into sensitive young minds, can change the course of history. Or herstory, depending on which letter of the chromosome you're eyeballing earth from.

That's millennium charm for ya.

After being a Mac user for more than 20 years, I just now learned — by accident — that ⌘→ is the command for “end line”. And omg, that's not all. ALL the arrows have similar directional function! How could I have ever missed this? Ms “only ever summons spotlight with ⌘-spacebar” Paradise, Esquiretrix.

Reminds me of my fav album when I was 15. Literally can't find it now, not on discogs (edit: found on discogs.) and definitely absent from youtube. Except for one song. And it's stuck in my head right now. Hopefully soon, also stuck in yours.

77 suburb technopunk for ya.

If anyone wants to send ye olde gramma Paradise a mid-year 'smas present, it's that. That. That rekkid. Ah, life is busy.

A girlfriend of mine is leaving our Small Town Space Colony back to Santa Cruz, land of misty surf, to reunite with her lobster. Penguin. Any one of those monogamous-for-life animals. I plan on showering her with enough dorky pinback buttons of my creation so she has enough nerdy charm to wear as flair at her new job for every 52 weeks of the year. She'll be the taco the town.

The race for the Stanley Cup has me in tatters. So proud of the Blues for coming back from sheer terror and putting a dent in Zdeno Chara's face. How anyone can reach 7 feet into the air and do that is an amazement in itself, because Zdeno Chara is literally a Wookie on skates. He is terrifying. I would never want to even walk in the same timezone as Zdeno Chara, and fortunately I've only had to do that a handful of times in my life. (Honestly he's one of my fav players in hockey because of the brusk intensity and insanely intelligent playermanship. This guy should own a country or lead large technically blessed mecha-goliaths into an ice battle, because he's 100% the right man for the job)

But I still wanna see Braden Schenn hoist the Stanley for Laila Anderson in St. Louis. She's there every game. Tears.

Two more absolutely too long slogs of a game left to figure out who gets what. I think I'll barf. Or place bets on both sides so I come out on top, either way. I've been watching the moneyline run back and forth over 0 the past week, almost as frantically as both parties in the overtimes in Game 3. Back forth back forth back forth. Seriously, no one knows what the fuck is going to happen in this match. BOS is currently +100 (they were +170 last week). STL at -120, which is like, where they've been the whole series.

Idk man. 2019 icebrawls for ya.

Even though I've never bet on any sport in my entire life, I want to get into this, because we all know how much I like monetizing hobbies. I just wish I had some sort of avuncular figure who can casually demystify all this vocabulary so I can get to the cash-out part.

I'm the laughing stock of both my elders, who laugh at every iPhone notification, since I only have it flash/chime at either hockey or husband. And my kids, who make fun of me every time I rise out of a dead slumber to check the score after every “goal” noise. It rings for any of the teams I'm following.

Gonna be an excruciatingly lonely summer for me, bud.

In other brawls, I'm reading through Richard Morgan's Thirteen while on my daily looooong treadmill sojourns. I have a whole 'nother post to fill with the greatest, most juicy-with-gore, or painted with a sheen of diaphanous silver silk, text I've read in a bit!

But for now I will dream of little pixie goaltenders butterflying and rolling-glove-saves around my head while I try really really hard to pay attention to my work at hand.

Work Chat. S10 Ep102. -- KK SEZ ADD RADIANCE STUPID! 💁‍♀️

Mon, 27 May 2019 04:37:00 +0000

Mastermind: Yeah shopify is way better at selling shopify than it is products. See how whats-her-fuck does it too her site is real simple and chunky i love how she doesnt use fancy shit kardashian’s Mastermind: Yeah when u feel like it: ask in chat how to manually change the SIZE of the product font IN TEH CODE because in settings it only defaults to this small size we need to edit our code manually but you don’t know where Paradise: Ok. Yeah Arapey sucks. Yeah our font is wretched for readability We have to scrap it absolutely Paradise: omg. Kim. haha: “Its silky and has brightening pearls. Buy it stupid girl” Mastermind: oh shit they actually say stupid girl!!?! YEAH so see where to cHANGE IT Paradise: We need another readable font Helvetica now? .. though I think that’s probably not the way to go... Two sans-serifs on the page. Ick. I’ll find a good serif font that is tested high for readability on screens Thats all that matters. High readability... so we can get our text into peoples BRAINS Paradise: No they didn’t say stupid girl, but the way they are using all caps and blunt wording MIGHT AS WELL ADD RADIANCE STUPID MAKE YOUR FACE FRESH AND AWAKENED STUPID WHAT KIND OF WOKE BITCH R U IF U CANT DO THAT STOP MISSING OUT BITCH ENTER YOUR FUCKING EMAIL SO YOU CAN BE PRETTY NO ONE LIKES YOU AS U ARE That’s what KK is subtexting >_< I’m dying that’s hilarious Mastermind: Kuntstache.

—

Pro tip: I mean, this should be completely obvious, but don't use fonts called aRAPEy. Arapey? A rape-y font? A rapey, unreadable font?

The 💡idea💡 is to make love 💋 to the reader's eyes. 👀 Not, um, #metoo them. 🍆🚷

Lessons learned.

And. Thanks, Kim. For your brutal capslock warlock schlock getting insecure women to follow your cock. Well played, big K.

/me smashing that publishplane.

Another day in, Paradise

How Girls Talk, S5 Ep1 - "Fuck Microdosing".

Mon, 27 May 2019 02:39:08 +0000

Secret Genius: Didn’t you say you had a good mushrooms connect? Can I have it again Any sort of psychedelic really Paradise: Yeah – my friend [redacted] Hes in [redacted, unless you need an LA hookup, then hmu] Secret Genius: Oh shit convenient! Can I get contact info?? Paradise: I just sent him your number. He’s a real good salesman, super good at following up. Total pro, hehe File Transfer: [redacted].vcf Secret Genius: Thank you so much!! Paradise: When you go can you get extra and send them to me? Secret Genius: Yea I’ll let you know prob won’t be until later in June. 2nd half Doing one on one reiki course on the 8th Paradise: No worries… I have a few to go around out here til then. Secret Genius: And going to Integratron next weekend You have some? Do you micro dose? I haven’t done it in years Paradise: Fuck microdosing If I wanna trip I want to pack my fucking bags No weekend warrior for me Secret Genius: Haha I was joking Cause I hear about it Paradise: Yeah, and it’s pretty lame Secret Genius: I’m trying to macrodose Paradise: Micro is for people who have NEVER done anything before and are too wimpy to try Secret Genius: I thought it was something therapeutic like that’s how I imagined it Like a little amount but regularly Paradise: Vitamins do better than microshroom any day Speaking from experience nah. Then you’ll build up this low key tolerance for mush So when you want to go on a vacation you’ll need a fucking magic mountain Secret Genius: Yea wtf! So much has changed this week it’s crazy I gotta process but I do wanna talk to you but I need a week or 2 Paradise: No prob babe! You know how “here” I am for you! If someone’s door is open to someone I would say I have the St Louis Gateway Arch open to you Fuck that a universal wormhole portal Secret Genius: Why do a psychedelic timidly? I don’t wanna trip balls I just wanna bounce them softly? It makes no sense the fucking point is to lose your mind. Your personal and spiritual growth Paradise: Though I hear wormholes can actually be quite small.. not how it is in scifi. They can be as big as a softball and go actually nowhere… lol haha. Yeah lets bounce some balls. That’s like if you touch your penis slightly versus a full on fuck with a babe. You’ll learn way more about yourself when you’re fucking a babe Secret Genius: Just the tip Yeaaa learning comes from experience the more extreme the more you learn you gotta go to the edge then taper it back. That’s how you get balance having experienced both ends of the extreme. Anyways I gotta go I’m very much on a journey right now I’m excited and nervous I’m feeling and processing shit I’ve been avoiding but I’m doing good I love you im praying for u Paradise: THANK YOU I LOVE YOU TOO Secret Genius: You are so precious to me Paradise: Thank you for praying for me Omg likewise I am cry

Dear universe, this is how girls actually talk.

Another day in, Paradise

"Talent is extremely common. What's rare is the willingness to endure the life of the writer."

Mon, 27 May 2019 02:04:48 +0000

The more I write, the happier I am. Written communication brings a calm, natural feeling over my soul.

Do you feel that way?

I deeply appreciate the ability to write persuasively, colloquially.

It's one of life's greatest skills.

And it is a skill, mind you. This isn't innate talent. Anyone can write. Especially when they practice. When one digs in and starts throwing down words — editing and re-editing — OR NOT — until something wonderful comes out.

There's something very tactile, very craftsman-like about massaging messages into place. To an artiste, there's always more to say and better ways to say it. Pieces aren't ever “done”, they just stand for now.

I weave in and out. I zoom into text, I sit back in my chair to take it all in. Back, forth, back, forth. Wondering what the audience sees. Sometimes I zoom REEEEally far out — this is called stepping away from the desk and going to get some ice cream — and that helps a bit. Distance. Making the heart grow fonder. Or. Making the mind go wander.

But inevitably we sit back down and keep writing or editing some more.

I'm writing a couple pieces right now, and gotta tell ya, I'm not disappointed in them. I reckon they'll sell a lot of widgets this Memorial Day weekend.

It makes you wonder what people are actually memorializing during this holiday.

Buying things?

Yes, definitely buying things.

Doorbuster adverts be darned.

—

Every child should be granted one amazing writing teacher per lifetime. Several if they're lucky. It'll change many lifetimes ever after. Someone, maybe an editor, maybe a straight up freshman professor, but someone who can coax your best words out of you. To sit and type and think, then solicit a RESPONSE from the thing you sat and typed and thought about. Bliss.

Another teacher who inspires life is experience.

The 1950s saw the start of a new style of schooling in the deprived inner city, where the teacher would actually bring their students out on field trips. Everything before that was in one room, the entire day.

Gardens. Airports. Behind the scenes at the market. This gave those kids, who would otherwise be secluded from society, the gift of EXPERIENCE. Their parents couldn't bring them out – their parents were working 2-3 jobs and didn't have a car. This experience — life experience — had effects that lasted into the next 3 generations!

We are all so lucky to have benefited from that paradigm shift.

This shift was informed by widening awareness of psychology and the looming achievement focus of the Space Race. The US would do anything to beat the Rooskie's at the nuclear armageddon — err, suborbital frontiersmanship — of mankind. And even though in the history books (depending on which ones you read) they BOTH won the Cold War, the real thing they won was a revolution in the education system.

I mean, education systems aren't at all THAT great, okay, the industrialization of children's daily rhythms isn't perfect, but the idea of field experience is (was) a fantastic start.

Yeah, the industrialized state schooling really does beat the curiosity and drive out of a kid, I know.

All isn't lost, though. As long as we're all here to keep it together.

—

Damn, I wonder how much alcohol is consumed merely because people can't communicate.

Loss for words. Social lubricant. Can't connect with the song of their soul. Need a crutch.

Just.

We all got along fine for 21 years when we could say whatever was on our minds, in the company of a nurturing spark... Fine, without spirits distorting the view of our inspired reality.

Anyway — I'm going to let you ponderwander that one for a bit while I get back to my work today. It's been nice chatting with you write.as, using your blankbox soapbox for some rather nice typing practice... So... thanks for listening!

Another day in, Paradise

PS – This was just conveniently and relevantly tweeted my way as I was about to smash the publish airplane:

“Talent is extremely common. What's rare is the willingness to endure the life of the writer.” — Our man, Kurt Vonnegut.

PPS – Yes. Absolutely. This is a beautiful happy place.

Okay okay okay, Rescuetime is about to pull the plug on my meanderings. Better fuck off! See ya, nerds!

Revenge of the Revenge

Fri, 24 May 2019 23:50:17 +0000

I'm happy to report that they are all now completely and unapologetically annihilated. (With no help from me – this was their own doing)

Dead Last to Dead First

Wed, 22 May 2019 19:39:39 +0000

Honestly I come in here with zero outline or zero idea of what I'm going to say, and while the open window is blank, I just go for it.

I'm starting to get really excited for the Blues and want to see them win the Stanley. Did you know they've never won a Stanley? And only one of the kids on that team has even gotten to a Playoff before? And that their goaltender is a ROOKIE, and that during the season they were DEAD LAST?

Their crowd, being from St. Louis music city, COOS. They sing along to the vintage organ in enterprise center.

There is nothing not completely cool about this whole organization this year.

They're my pick for Stanley. Last time they were this far, FORTY NINE YEARS ago, they also played the Bruins. And while I love the graceful plays from Marchand and Bergeron and the whole Boston crew, I'm really rooting for the Blues. (STL has totally drowned SJS, probably another factor that wins my loyalty. I think all VGK fans are secretly rooting STL this year.)

It's going to be a nail biter, I think. Boston is really, really good.

And I think STL only beat the shit out of the Sharks because SJS was down 3 really good players, which totally shattered SJS' chemistry. Sharks were a very pheromonal team. I'll explain that in a different message. This was just an aside I added in later as I was walking away from the computer.

Rubbed in my face in the local news lately is about Jeopardy James Holzhauer, who is a professional sports bettor from my town, who holds record for the second most Jeopardy win streak and second most earnings streak, second to a guy who achieved this in 3x more time than him. JJ is obvs going to go on to be reigning champ on all this. He says his secret is commanding the buzzer. And yes, I signed up for the thing that generates the paywall. This was a good read. (And a good app!)

So seeing James Holzhauer's ability to turn betting into a legit personal franchise has me kind of wanting to put a few points in for the playoffs. I'd limit it to trainer's “chump change”, but I think it'd be fun. Money is just points on a scoreboard, anyway. Maybe next year hockey will be one of those hobbies I have accidentally monetized... which seals it as a legit hobby, since all my legit hobbies are monetized, and all my jobs are legit hobbies.

I got to thinking about this whole world of white guys playing sports, and how dominant a career and influence on the American economy it is.

How Greco-Roman it is.

To be whiling away on games and spectacles while there's crop failures and pressing problems in our reality.

That these ubermen spend every waking moment preparing for their spotlight hours. Grinding grinding grinding on machines purpose built for the long slog.

The billions of dollars exchanged daily in the form of merchandise, bets, tickets, transportation to/from, billable hours diverted talking about events...

And like in Greece, the athletes go on to be part of the peri-elite. A certain rung of the pyramid.

Anyway. I'm just staring out the rain pattered window thinking about this.

I would like to sharpen my mathmind. New hobby time. Probably something I can partake in with my eldest, since we stumbled upon the greatest new math teacher... God I wish I knew this guy before I ever learned arithmetic! Everything that took me years to practice he's turned into an amazingly shortcutted body trick. Embodied/visual math is stunning!

All right.

Gotta run. Meds, writing, stretching... all lay out in front of me today.

Haha, wait.

So there's this problem I have in one of my jobs, where ultimately the answer is calling a supplier in France and getting a new part, but this is something I've been slacking off on. Instead, I've added up to 3-5 minutes per piece on crafting these widgets because I have thousands of American/Chinese parts I “think” I have to exhaust. But the fucking real story is... I can just get my FUNCTIONING part from France, spend 10 seconds on the assembly, and SELL the American/Chinese parts on Amazon, netting me more time AND money.

I think once the playoffs are done, my motivation to do this will skyrocket, because one of the things that gets me into the office every day to crank out more widgets is the warm television screen next to my desk and the 3 hour hockey game. I bang away at widget after widget, popping my head up when the CROWD tells me something COOL is about to happen.

They're psychically wired to the beat of the puck, so their collective anthill sounds are the thing that announce the actual fucking intensity of what's happening.

It's a whole different feeling being a fan to a player. When I played in front of big crowds I didn't even notice the fucking crowds were there until the end! As a fan, I'm just one invisible component of a chortling positive mass that spikes and flows along with pheromone/adrenaline spikes and flows, amplifying the spikes and flows. Elevating. It's cool. Idk.

Anyway, once I'm done being part of the active trance, I'll rally hard to get this new French assembly flown in so I can increase my efficiency, freeing up time to work on my slapshot or something, so I can play hockey with the boys during the offseason, in a beer league that NO ONE will watch, and will be so much fun that someone will have to pry bodies off ice.

So yeah, now I'm done. Stomach is grumbling, back needs a stretch, and rain is starting to creep through my windowsills.

Another day in, Paradise

visionaries

Tue, 21 May 2019 23:18:58 +0000

I wish we could tag other people's posts — I know a few people who I'd mark as #visionary — which would help others who are seeking visionaries, and not just regular human condition stuff.

Saw a tweet yesterday that I'll try to recreate from memory, because I don't remember who twote it (not my feed).

Said something about...

When men experience paranoia they do so in systemic scale (alien abduction, govt conspiracy theories)

When women experience paranoia they do so at a personal scale (crystal woo, ... and some other stuff I can't remember)

In that way,

Is it sexist to want to see more systemic visionariness? I think women are perfectly capable of systemic thinking. Self nominated case in point. Maybe I'm delusional or an exception, but I don't think so. I have an PHD in overthinking says my girlfriend. But see, so does she.

If we fairer sex were all so liberated to think.

Anyway. #visionary tag. For those expansive thinkers out there, male or female.

Just some thoughts from paradise.

.:~:..:~:..:~:..:~:..:~:..:~:..:~:..:~:..:~:..:~:. published not proofread. #NeverLookBackspace! Words, Ideas, Magic copyrighted by Zem in Paradise. this is confidential communication. Protected by US and International law.