paradise

Mastermind: Yeah shopify is way better at selling shopify than it is products. See how whats-her-fuck does it too her site is real simple and chunky i love how she doesnt use fancy shit kardashian’s Mastermind: Yeah when u feel like it: ask in chat how to manually change the SIZE of the product font IN TEH CODE because in settings it only defaults to this small size we need to edit our code manually but you don’t know where Paradise: Ok. Yeah Arapey sucks. Yeah our font is wretched for readability We have to scrap it absolutely Paradise: omg. Kim. haha: “Its silky and has brightening pearls. Buy it stupid girl” Mastermind: oh shit they actually say stupid girl!!?! YEAH so see where to cHANGE IT Paradise: We need another readable font Helvetica now? .. though I think that’s probably not the way to go... Two sans-serifs on the page. Ick. I’ll find a good serif font that is tested high for readability on screens Thats all that matters. High readability... so we can get our text into peoples BRAINS Paradise: No they didn’t say stupid girl, but the way they are using all caps and blunt wording MIGHT AS WELL ADD RADIANCE STUPID MAKE YOUR FACE FRESH AND AWAKENED STUPID WHAT KIND OF WOKE BITCH R U IF U CANT DO THAT STOP MISSING OUT BITCH ENTER YOUR FUCKING EMAIL SO YOU CAN BE PRETTY NO ONE LIKES YOU AS U ARE That’s what KK is subtexting >_< I’m dying that’s hilarious Mastermind: Kuntstache.

—

Pro tip: I mean, this should be completely obvious, but don't use fonts called aRAPEy. Arapey? A rape-y font? A rapey, unreadable font?

The 💡idea💡 is to make love 💋 to the reader's eyes. 👀 Not, um, #metoo them. 🍆🚷

Lessons learned.

And. Thanks, Kim. For your brutal capslock warlock schlock getting insecure women to follow your cock. Well played, big K.

/me smashing that publishplane.

Another day in, Paradise

— .:~:..:~:..:~:..:~:..:~:..:~:..:~:..:~:..:~:..:~:. published not proofread. #NeverLookBackspace! Words, Ideas, Magic copyrighted by Zem in Paradise. this is confidential communication. Protected by US and International law.